midnight cries.

cyber-world, praise yourself.

you are the first to know.

I can't sleep 'til midnight lately.

Maybe insomnia.

If couldn't sleep and couldn't stop crying is insomnia, then I am insomniac.

You see, worries and everything else dam up and were released in midnight.

But the worst of all is the fear of losing.

Mom has been through a lot of things that I doubt normal people is able to endure. In recent years, she suffers this unsettling pain in her bone. Tibia maybe.

She went to Singapore last week, did a full check-up and is waiting for its result with a fear of getting zarcoma. She is a philanthropist together with Dad and has helped a young girl with zarcoma. That just pitch another worry.

She shows no fear or worry but I feel it.

In midnight, I would look at her back or her snoring face and slowly sneaks out of the room and sob. Maybe the fear of losing her and not seeing her face, hearing her loud shrieking voices, eating foods together, missing her stout figure, just blindly killing me.

No matter how much we argue, if I lost her, big part of me would die.

She made me the way I am.

We joke, we fight, we shop, we eat, we sleep and we share everything together.

All I could do is to make her life better. I know I may not be so good in this but I will try my best. She is the best thing in my life.